this is not here lyrics – deciding tonight

this is what i wanted
a chance for a better life than this
a life that i can’t get if i’m stuck here on dry land
and when we’re on the open sea
i’ll take my secrets write them down for you to see
tear them to shreds and then i’ll throw them overboard
i’ll watch my words fade into the tide
when the anchor drops for the last time i’ll be free

and i know that i’ll be miserable
when the hurricanes become unbearable
and when the lines get tangled up
and the nets are torn apart
having turned into the wind
and the crashing waves they knock me from my feet
i hope you’ll remember me
when this boy becomes a man

if i never make it home
just know i didn’t die alone

pretending this is all i want to say
even if i’m turned into the wind
pretending this is all i want to say as you cry this is good bye
pretending this is all i want to say
even though i’ve turned into the wind
pretending this is all i want to say
it’s not all i want to say
it’s not all i want to say
that’s all there is to say…

pretending this is all i want to say
even if i’m turned into the wind
pretending this is all i want to say as you cry this is good bye
pretending this is all i want to say
even though i’ve turned into the wind
pretending this is all i want to say as you cry this is

/ deciding tonight lyrics